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Your 2019 TUSHY Horoscope

2018 may have been somewhat of a shitshow in the figurative and literal sense. But guess what, 2019 is your year. I’ve consulted with the stars around Uranus and have your 2019 predictions. Spoiler alert, it's going to be a sustainable, clean and productive year.

Aries

The warrior of the Zodiac is always up for a challenge and you’re ready for a new adventure. 2019 is the perfect year to plan journeys and even start new habits including committing to a sustainable lifestyle by switching to TUSHY.

Bonus: Also, you're going to discover the Road to El Dorado. Lucky. 

Your TUSHY: TUSHY Royale Classic

 

 

 


 

 

Taurus

2019 Horoscope

2019 is the year to start cleaning the skeletons out of your closet and to start cleaning your butt better.  All of your self-actualizations will be rewarded toward the end of the year once you commit to living healthier and cleaner.

Bonus: You'll also marry the entire cast of Riverdale.

Your TUSHY: TUSHY Noir Spa

Gemini

2019 Horoscope

Whether you’re saying you “doo” or “don’t,” there’s no question that lots of relationship activity has already begun shaking up your world. Friends may become lovers this year, Gemini, so watch out for romance surfacing in extremely unexpected places. Make sure your ass is ready with TUSHY. Keep your bottom clean and ready for the love coming your way.

Bonus: I see you will find out that Beyonce is your mom. Move over Rumi and Sir!

Your TUSHY: TUSHY Bamboo Classic

Cancer

2019 Horoscope

This is a big year for you, Cancer, so get ready for some huge change. Late 2018, you focused on health and wellness and through December 2019, fortune will continue to smile on your commitment to self-care starting from the bottom. Full self-care includes caring for your booty with TUSHY.

Bonus: The heavenly bodies say you'll discover you are descended from Hercules (the Kevin Sorbo version.)

You TUSHY: TUSHY Pink Spa

Leo

2019 Horoscope

Leo, aka zodiac royalty. You also know that you’re inspired by your ability not only to create but also to share your expressions with the world. You can look forward to lots of passion and and romance throughout 2019. Throughout the year you’ll be incorporate your new, brilliant ideas into daily life with a special someone or someones like introducing them to TUSHY.

Bonus: An actual lion will eat you and then you will be reborn an Obama. 

Your TUSHY: TUSHY Royale Classic

Virgo

The past 12 months have radically shifted your perception of community. You’re feeling all sorts of domestic this year and you shouldn't be afraid to lean into your impulse to upgrade your home and nest. In fact, the more you invest in your domain, the more you discover that structure isn’t just about comfort; it’s also about building a foundation that allows you to increase. Start with your bathroom by adding TUSHY.

Bonus: You'll lose your virginity. It'll be even better than the first time. 

Your TUSHY: TUSHY Silver Spa

Libra

2019 Horoscope

You’re the diplomat of the zodiac. As an air sign, you’re genuinely interested in what’s going on with your peers. After networking and rubbing elbows for the majority of 2019, by the end of the year, you’ll be ready to retreat into your personal sanctuary to recharge and take care of you. Do it with TUSHY!

Bonus: No matter how much you eat, the scale will always read your goal weight. 

Your TUSHY: TUSHY Blue and Bamboo Classic

Scorpio

2019 Horoscope

You already know that 2018 was a huge year for you in the stars. After all, you’re the one who experienced all the drama here on earth. Now, you have all the tools to make the moves you want to make. 2019 is all about personal finances, material possessions, and butt-worth. TUSHY will be the perfect first personal investment.

Bonus: You'll gain 2.1 million instagram followers and none of them will troll you. 

Your TUSHY: TUSHY Pink Spa

Sagitarrius

2019 Horoscope

You’re an optimist, so every year has potential, but 2019 is actually your year. Starting in November 2018, your planetary ruler, Jupiter, went into your own sign so really embrace the vibes, Sagittarius. If your ass is feeling lucky, you should be. It should also be clean for all the amazing things that are going to happen this year. That’s where TUSHY comes in.

Bonus: You'll win the coveted EGOT and get all of your Scout Badges.

Your TUSHY: TUSHY Bamboo Spa

Capricorn

2019 Horoscope

Get ready for big changes. This year is a great time to deepen your relationship with astrology or your own body and energy: Your intuition is active, so this is a wonderful opportunity to use spirituality to explore the gray areas of existence. Make sure each of your chakras are cleared… primarily your root chakra. TUSHY can help with that.

Bonus: Your Starbucks barista will spell your name correctly. 

Your TUSHY: TUSHY Noir Classic

Aquarius

2019 Horoscope

Though you value your fierce independence, this year will encourage you to remember the importance of teamwork, friendship, and your extended network. Don’t be afraid to partner up with new collaborators and like that new TUSHY on your toilet.

Bonus: Mark Cuban is going to buy your Cubby Cube Company while solving a Rubix Cube.

Your TUSHY: TUSHY Spa Silver

Pisces

2019 Horoscope

2019 is an extremely lucky time to make big moves in your career. Go ahead and discuss a promotion with your boss or start applying for jobs that guarantee exciting possibilities. This is also a great year to launch your own business. No matter how you decide to structure your career, you can rest assured knowing that your butt is going to be super clean with TUSHY.

Bonus: You'll discover the lost city of Atlantis and be their savior. 

Your TUSHY: TUSHY Blue and Bamboo Spa

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