No one wants to be a member of the dead legs pooping club. But here we are, Googling sexy things like legs falling asleep on the toilet while stomping our feet between courtesy flushes. Holy sh*t, when did life get so glamorous?
The good news? It’s all simple science with easy fixes.
Why DO Your Legs Fall Asleep on the Toilet?
There are two reasons why your #2s are giving you pins and needles:
Your Pooping Posture Isn’t the Best
Your legs fall asleep on the toilet when you hunch over to play Wordle or scroll Insta. The blood flow to your pelvis constricts, which limits circulation in your legs, feet and toes.
This also mega-kinks your colon, making it even slower and more difficult to poo. Which adds to the circulation problem.
Learn the best position to poop in to keep all your systems in flow.
You’re Pushing Too Hard When You Poop
Grunting, straining and otherwise bearing down on your business spikes pressure in your abdomen and spinal column. This can cause spinal discs to move against nerves in the spine and shoot all the prickles down your legs.
Avoid pushing too hard to poop to prevent dead legs and other butt sadness like hemorrhoids. (Once you’ve birthed a hemmy, you’ll never force a poo again.)
Is It Bad If Your Legs Fall Asleep on the Toilet?
Temporary tingles are nothing to stress over. When you correct your posture and ease up on pushing, your body returns to equilibrium. But numb extremities can trip you up when you dismount from the throne.
To avoid an open-butt spill or dead-leg stagger, sit up straight to allow the blood flow to return to your extremities before standing.
Better yet, perfect your poo-sitioning, potty time and toilet setup to prevent pins and needles from the start.
How to Prevent Pins and Needles on the Pot
Remember when you were forever-sore at your office desk and you made literally 3 dumb changes that got rid of all your back pain?
The same science applies for untingling your toilet time!
Don’t Hunch Over
Posture matters. Sit in an upright position with your knees higher than your hips. This keeps your blood pumping and your colon flowing like a brand new soft-serve machine.
Try Using a Toilet Stool
If you need a little help in the positioning department, try a toilet stool. The TUSHY Ottoman is available in two heights that perfectly elevate your feet and unkink your colon.
Did we mention we are the New York Times Wirecutter’s #1 Toilet Stool of 2021? ;-)
Don’t Spend So Much Time On Pooping
Pooping is not a marathon sport. If you’re prairie-dogging for 30 minutes OR have finished your business but are now responding to company emails, flush and stand and try again later.
Your toilet time should be 10-15 minutes max.
Change Positions
This is no different than when you wake up in the middle of the night with a dead arm that you have to fling across the bed.
Change your body position until you feel the numbness lifting.
Get a Toilet Cushion
Okay no, this isn’t the sexiest solution. But if your feet feel like horse hooves every time you sh*t, get yourself a butt cushion.
In Bummary:
Poor posture, excess time on the crapper and straining your bowels all contribute to your legs falling asleep on the toilet.
Practice responsible pooping, and get yourself a bidet attachment to make cleanup fast and easy.