The Bare Necessities

Alex Keller | 14 Jul, 2017

Shirt and Shoes Not Required

Trying to figure out what to wear today? Just put on your finest Birthday Suit because today is National Nude Day, baby! Beginning in 1976 in New Zealand, this year marks the 41st anniversary of National Nude Day and we here at TUSHY are proud supporters of bare booties - duh.

How to celebrate National Nude Day without a slap on the wrist:

  • Nude tanning in your backyard (or roof, or wherever you live) - for the more discreet nudist, this is a great way to free up those nuts and berries without giving everyone a taste.
  • Go to a nude spa - these are a thing?! YES! These spas have saunas, mineral pools, full-body exfoliation scrubs, and massages. Happy Endings not included.
  • Wear one of those ridiculous bikini t-shirts - here’s a more appropriate way of celebrating, but good luck explaining to your boss why there’s a naked lady on your shirt. Or, if you're feeling adventurous we also sell a TUSHY Butthole Shirt. We here at TUSHY take no responsibility for the actions of our readers… but you should totally do it.
  • Do some naked yoga - be one with your body and truly see yourself... from every angle.
  • And if none of those options appeal to you, at least celebrate by popping a frozen pizza in the oven and lying in front of your TV with the air conditioning on full blast to beat this July heat.

Here’s to the daredevils out there; we know you’re reading this. With nude beaches, you can now finally go to the shoreline and not have to worry about those awful tan lines. Pack a cooler, bring your beach towel, and leave your bathing suit behind because at these ocean fronts, full frontal is encouraged. Here’s a list of some of the best nude beaches in the United States:

  • Black’s Beach, San Diego, CA
  • Gunnison Beach, Sandy Hook, NJ
  • UFO Beach, South Padre Island, TX
  • Lighthouse Beach, Islip, NY
  • Haulover Beach, Miami, FL
  • Collins Beach, Sauvie Island, OR
  • Kehena Beach, Big Island, HI
  • Baker Beach, San Francisco, CA

Okay, so maybe you don’t want to go to the beach au naturale. After all, who wants sand to get *there*? Not us, thanks! That’s why we also compiled a list of cities where public nudity is allowed (or at least where nudity laws are more lenient). Here they are:

  • Portland, OR
    • The home of the annual Naked Bike Ride - is anyone else thinking about American Pie right now?
  • Miami, FL
    • What happens in Miami, stays in Miami
  • Austin, TX
    • Hippie Hollow is one of the only clothing optional parks that are maintained by the government. I repeat: the government wants you to be naked here. Everything's bigger in Texas.
  • Seattle, WA
    • If you want to walk around with your chest held high...or sagging a bit, then Seattle is the place to be. Going topless is 100% legal here.
  • Los Angeles, CA
    • In order to get in trouble for nudity in LA, you have to also be lewd. So as long as you’re not freaking anyone out with your big ol’ bum, you’re fine.
  • Philadelphia, PA
    • Again, it’s all about semantics in Philadelphia. If you do want to be more careful though, there is always Philly’s Naked Bike Ride. It’s Always Moon-y in Philadelphia.
  • New York, NY
    • Let’s be honest, this one was a given.
  • Washington, DC
    • The only laws “covering” public nudity in our nation’s capital are the ones that mention the genital area. In other words, feel free to flash some boob to government officials and get away with it.

Uplevel your hole bathroom experience.


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