Harry Po(o)ter and The Chamber of Secrets
29 Jun, 2017
I hope mail is all they drop.
1. FantASStical Beasts and Where They Poo
There is very little in this world more terrifying than a flock of birds covering the sun with their dark wings envelo… you get it. But try a flock of seagulls with toxic poop. A thing of nightmares. Seagulls around the world eat landfill garbage and waste everyday. A recent study done at Duke University, showed that seagulls who fed at the South Wake Landfill in North Carolina were transferring high amounts of nitrogen and phosphorous to nearby lakes via their feces. The long term effects of which can harm organisms living in that environment and make the water cloudy and more difficult to treat for drinking.
He’s not going to compost easily. . .
2. Wingardium Lavatoriosa
Have you ever wondered how you can convert all of the waste that you create into something useful? You are the Master of Repurposing. And much like you’ve repurposed those old wine bottles into that funky chandelier you’re trying to sell on Etsy, you can now repurpose your poop! (No, don’t sell THAT on Etsy.) New York City just opened up its first composting toilets in Prospect Park. The new toilets are able to efficiently and safely divert solid waste to compost tanks underneath the building where worms (I hope they’re gummy) will turn your butt-gold into nutrient-rich fertilizer. Fertilizer that will be used to grow nutritious foods. Nutritious foods which you will then eat and the poop out into another composting toilet. And that, my friends, is the The Circle of Life.
Catch up on the Evening Prophet during your evening Poo.
3. Wingardium Lavatoriosa
Toilet rituals: A game of Two Dots? Reading up on the Wall Street Journal? Or are you more of a Highlights Magazine kind of person? Swiping through Tinder? Maybe getting some writing done? Am I writing this on the toilet right now? Why am I asking you so many questions? The point is we all have our habits. But did you know some habits we’ve developed AFTER using the bathroom can pose a health hazard. Habits we don’t even think about such as flushing with the toilet lid still up. According to some experts, contaminated drops of toilet water from the average flush can shoot 15 feet and land on many different surfaces throughout your bathroom…including your toothbrush. Feel free to vomit now. The simple solution is to break the bad habit of leaving the toilet seat up when you flush. And if you’re in the mood for breaking bad, unhealthy habits it might be time to try TUSHY, while you’re at it.